1. Word processors never display a cursor.

2. You never have to use the spacebar when typing long sentences.

3. All monitors display 2 inch high letters.

4. High-tech computers, such as those used by NASA, the CIA, or some such governmental institution, have easy-to-understand graphical interfaces.

5. Those that don't will have incredibly powerful text-based command shells that can correctly understand and execute commands typed in plain English.

6. Corollary: You can gain access to any information you want by simply typing "ACCESS ALL OF THE SECRET FILES" on any keyboard.

7. Likewise, you can infect a computer with a destructive virus by simply typing "UPLOAD VIRUS." Viruses cause temperatures in computers, just like they do in humans. After a while, smoke billows out of disk drives and monitors.

8. All computers are connected. You can access the information on the villain's desktop computer, even if it's turned off.

9. Powerful computers beep whenever you press a key or whenever the screen changes. Some computers also slow down the output on the screen so that it doesn't go faster than you can read. The *really* advanced ones also emulate the sound of a dot-matrix printer as the characters come across the screen.

10. All computer panels have thousands of volts and flash pots just underneath the surface. Malfunctions are indicated by a bright flash, a puff of smoke, a shower of sparks, and an explosion that forces you backward. See #7, above)

11. People typing away on a computer will turn it off without saving the data.

12. A hacker can get into the most sensitive computer in the world before intermission and guess the secret password in two tries.

13. Any PERMISSION DENIED has an OVERRIDE function.

14. Complex calculations and loading of huge amounts of data will be accomplished in under three seconds. In the movies, modems transmit data at two gigabytes per second.

15. When the power plant/missile site/whatever overheats, all the control panels will explode, as will the entire building.

16. If you display a file on the screen and someone deletes the file, it also disappears from the screen. There are no ways to copy a backup file -- and there are no undelete utilities.

17. If a disk has got encrypted files, you are automatically asked for a password when you try to access it.

18. No matter what kind of computer disk it is, it'll be readable by any system you put it into. All application software is usable by all computer platforms.

19. The more high-tech the equipment, the more buttons it has. However, everyone must have been highly trained, because the buttons aren't labelled.

20. Most computers, no matter how small, have reality-defying three-dimensional, real-time, photo-realistic animated graphics capability.

21. Laptops, for some strange reason, always seem to have amazing real-time video phone capabilities and the performance of a CRAY-MP.

22. Whenever a character looks at a VDU, the image is so bright that it projects itself onto his/her face.

23. Computers never crash during key, high-intensity activities. Humans operating computers never make mistakes under stress.

24. Programs are fiendishly perfect and never have bugs that slow down users.

25. Any photograph can have minute details pulled out of it. You can zoom into any picture as far as you want to. Example: "What's that fuzzy thing in the corner? I don't know, let's check. It's the murder weapon! Let's look under the bed for the killers shoes. no, just some comics books (Marvel 1954, very rare). Let's check the closet shelves...!"

Movie Online

Dude, who watches a movie in such deep detail, you must be eating sleeping, showring, dressing, did I mention eat and sleep? Computers to notice all these!!!LOL!!!

My dear juikk!

I KNOW there are better things in life than watching movies in such detail - or being on the computer! The list is copied, of course, although I tend to agree with quite a number of the points!

Yea, probably keeping your nose in a book!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! Pure geek! Always Geek!!!!!!

Pietro, my dearest younger and ignorant brother

I shall not deign to reply to your gross exaggeration! But, yes, I love my books - at least they never insult me!

my list

Why are all computers in movies Macs , can't Alienware ever sponsor a movie?

people in movies can type 160 words a minute , escpecially secret agent guys , is this a pre-requisite to getting hired?
wanted secret agent guy , must be able to type 160 words per minute and perform Kung Fu?

why is the password always GOD , never trying to fool bad guys by using DOG?

why can they take a hardisk out in 10 seconds where as i need 10 minutes get the dang IDE cable off?

Did AOL ever fire that "you got mail" guy for having such an annoying voice in movies?

password also must be your childs name , hopefully it is Stephanie .. i spell it wrong as Stefanie ,hopefully the bad guys do too

word are case sensitive in movies , DO WE REALLY NEED TO YELL OUR VIRUS EXECUTE COMMANDS!!!

in movies ,all computer geeks drink Pepsi or some obscure brand with a gazilion tons of caffeine, i like Coke

my silly Geek list

Omer,


You may even remember the time when the password was the hoary old chestnut: "letmein"?

Peace, brother One-bit or byte, peace!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! Just a joke! Chill out a bit; you are much too uptight about silly things!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

real cruel P,,

do people around you have nervous breakdowns? quese not but i`m sure you do bring smiles on their faces after the torment,,,,,,,,,

__________________
[b]TRE[/B

tre!!!!!!!!!!!!!

To each his or her own. Maybe he really does/did deserve it!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!